Reasons why Ariana Grande only shows the left side of her face

Pop star Ariana Grande is obsessed with the left hand side of her face which has lead to some interesting demands when she attends engagements. The question is, what's so wrong with her right cheek that she never wants people to see it?

ariana grande left

21 year old pop starlet Ariana Grande, the singer behind songs including Problem, Bang Bang, and Break Free, is getting quite the reputation as a diva who is unpleasant to work with. In fact, she’s apparently such a pain in the ass to work with, that her “life coach” recently quit on her, not that I know what a life coach even does, but apparently he was important.

Each appearance she makes apparently comes with a diva-esque list of demands that sources say rival those of Mariah Carey. The following excerpt is taken from Star Magazine “While filming a TV special in mid-August, Ariana Grande was impossible to work with! “She was a total nightmare,” explains a source on the set. “She demanded to be shot only on her left side and told the lighting crew that if they used red light, she would ‘kill herself’.” Producers at the venue were so disgusted with the way she treated everyone, they almost pulled the plug! “They were saying that she is, hands down, the most difficult person they have ever had to work with”.

ariana grande memeThere is one thing on her list of demands which stands out above the others though; the strange clause which prevents photography of the right side of her face. She takes it pretty seriously as well. Last week she even cancelled a photoshoot halfway through because the photographer tried to shoot the wrong side of her head and she didn’t like the photos.

Nearly every single photo you see of her is from the left and she even refuses to stand on the left hand side of a camera shot on interviews because the right side of her face would be on show. It’s lead to some quite entertaining photos as she bends her neck around awkwardly to ensure that only her best side is visible for the cameras.

Her claim is that she only wants people to see the left side of her face so that they can see the dimple on her left cheek. Surely nobody is that self-obsessed though? I mean, a face is a face and its pretty much the same on both sides. How does having a small dimple on one side be worth getting so worked up about?

I can’t help but wonder what is really wrong with Ariana Grandes right cheek? There must be another reason why she doesn’t want people to see it, and it sounds like it’s something major.

Why does Ariana Grande only show people the left side of her face?

I have come up with some plausible explanations to about why she doesn’t want anybody to see the right hand side of her face;

  • She doesn’t actually have a right cheek, instead the right side of her face is completely void.
  • She has a regrettable tattoo of an ice cream cone on her right cheek like Gucci Mane.
  • The right side of her face is so horrifying that it would scare young children.
  • Her ever-present and horrific 90’s inspired ponytail doesn’t work to its full effect from the right.
  • If anybody saw the right side of her face, her ponytail would fall out and she would lose the source of her celebrity power.
  • She has a third nipple… on her right cheek.
  • There’s a family of squirrels living inside her right cheek.
  • The right side of her face actually writes all of her songs and has diva demands of its own which include “no photographs”.
  • Her right cheek is actually a treasure map which she doesn’t want to share with anybody else.
  • She has a giant hairy mole the size of Tasmania on there.
  • She can only pull off that annoying half smile/half sneeze expression from the left.
  • Her right side has really persistent stubble that grows back as soon as she shaves it off.
  • It’s something to do with her stupid knee high boots.
  • She has one less problem without it.

I’m an ex breakfast radio DJ who no longer hosts a breakfast radio show so I created this website to give myself somewhere new to make jokes and rant about life, pop culture, celebrities and stupid people.



  2. Wtf, this is another blog that captures the audacity of haters out there. Fuck off!!! She is a human being, and she has feelings.

    • 1) Its a humor/satire website
      2) It is blatantly obvious this isn’t a serious post
      3) Everything said at the start is true according to sources
      4) I highly doubt she would read this anyway

      • i just really love her she has insierpd me to sing, she has insierpd me that life is short use your time wisely n always have joy. i love her i’m doing my music project on her right now. i just wish she would discover me, im a great dancer but don’t know about the singing people say i can but don’t think so.

  3. Thank God I am not the only one who is bothered by this! I happen to think she is a real life Picasso painting and only has a left side. Actually, since it appears she has a problem annunciating words when she sings, maybe she doesn’t have a right ear!

    • Ariana looks absolutely gogreous! She’s so beautiful! I love her so much! She’s so talented! She always has the effect on people to never give up on there dreams and that’s why she’s such an inspiration! She has that effect on people she makes people become better people. I love her so much, she’s my hero, my inspiration my idol, she’s the reason I live life to the fullest (: I love you ariana grande. (:

      • Geez I think I just threw up in my mouth. Get fucking over it dude, she is a demanding bitch that demeans & degrades everyone she feels is lesser than herself. That would include you. Deluded asshat.

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